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  1. #1
    Registered User equus's Avatar
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    Talking Improve your computer vocabulary !!

    Analog: Hors d'oeuvre, usually made from cheese and covered with crushed nuts

    Backup: Opposite of go forward

    Batch Processing: Making a lot of cookies at once

    Binary: Possessing the ability to have friends of both sexes

    Bit: 12 1/2 cents

    Branch: If watered, it will grow into a computer club (see computer club)

    Buffer: Programmer who works in the nude

    Bug: 1. Programmer's term for a feature 2. An elusive creature living in a program which makes it incorrect. Note: the activity of "debugging" or removing bugs from a program ends when a programmer gets tired of doing it, not when all the bugs are removed

    Character density: The number of very weird people in the office, divided by the floor space

    Computer: A device designed to speed and automate errors

    Computer Club: Used to strike computer forcefully upon receiving error messages

    Coding: An addictive drug

    Compile: A heap of decomposing vegetable matter

    Compiler: Noah Webster (1758-1843)

    Console: What one does to a depressed computer

    Cursor: An expert in 4-letter words

    Dump: A system programmer's work area

    Feature: Hardware limitation as described by a marketing representative (BT on V710)

    Hardware: The parts of a computer which can be kicked

    Keyboard: An instrument used for entering errors into a system

    Language: A system of organizing and defining error messages

    Loop: See loop ?? (Chicago Loop?)

    Machine-independent Program: A program which will not run on any machine (BT on i700)

    Microcomputer: One millionth of a computer

    Null String: The result of a 4-hour database search

    On-line: The idea that a human should always be accessible

    Password: The nonsense word taped to your terminal

    Performance: A statement of the speed at which a computer system works. Or rather, might work under certain circumstances. Or was rumored to be working about a month ago (i700 sans BT)

    Printer: Johann Gutenberg 1400-1468

    Quality Control: Ensuring that the quality of a product does not get out of hand and add to the cost of its manufacture or design (VZW comes to mind)

    Strategy: A long-range plan whose merit cannot be evaluated until sometime after those creating it have left the organization

    User: Someone requiring drug rehabilitation

    8-bit machine: A computer selling for $1.00 (see bit)

    16-bit machine: A computer selling for $2.00 (see bit)

    this has been done due to the result of JP making me take the Nerd Test!!!
    Funny it worked.....the last time! Now I am not sure what was working before they put a hole in my head !

  2. #2
    Registered User jpmihalk's Avatar
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    Oh sure, blame it on me....
    John

  3. #3
    Registered User equus's Avatar
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    Originally posted by jpmihalk
    Oh sure, blame it on me....
    Oh..no, I meant to say my Mentor!!!!!
    Funny it worked.....the last time! Now I am not sure what was working before they put a hole in my head !

  4. #4
    Cornfused MGuzzy's Avatar
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    Re: Improve your computer vocabulary !!

    Originally posted by equus
    ...

    this has been done due to the result of JP making me take the Nerd Test!!!
    Funny stuff. Gee Equus, are you still feeling self conscience about scoring 99 on the nerd test?!? I think YOU should be JP's mentor...after all you got the higher score...
    mg
    Last edited by MGuzzy; 01-24-2005 at 12:49 PM.
    Luck is where opportunity meets preparation.

  5. #5
    Registered User jpmihalk's Avatar
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    Re: Re: Improve your computer vocabulary !!

    Originally posted by MGuzzy
    Funny stuff. Gee Equus, are you still feeling self conscience about scoring 99 on the nerd test?!? I think you should be JP's mentor...after all you got the higher score...
    mg
    Thank you!!! Thank you!!!!
    John

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